I was going to blog sooner, but to be quite honest, I just couldnt be bothered.
Today is four days post op, and I have had the most dreadful day really. I got myself really upset and worked up last night so did not sleep well, was awake at 5:15 (prague time) and couldn't get back to sleep, when I eventually did I slept in till nearly 10, which was nice as I have been woken no later than 9 every day this week. The nurse came in around 10/10:30 to tell me I can have a shower, she helped my take off all the stuff and I twinged myself where my left drain had been, the pain was sharp and quick, and I thought I was ok for a minute then I started to go dizzy, my vision blurred, head spinned, i went cold but roasting, shaky, was awful, not felt like that since I did my toe in under dads door. I twinged it again later but apart from the pain, nothing happened. I also had to cough earlier, painful, must not for the next few weeks cough, sneeze, hiccup or violently laugh, it hurts alot, if I get a cold, I will cry.
As for the rest of the days since my last blog, monday was pretty boring, I had blood tests and an ecg, a chat with the surgeon where she drew all over me in blue pen, and then a chat with the doctor, who seemed more interested in being amazed at my tattoos than telling me how fit I was, but I had a clean bill of health, Thank god!
Tuesday I had to be up at 6am to have a shower, get my stuff together and be at the hosp for 7, when I got there I found I was sharing a room with a german lady having her boobs and eyelids done (and who was also the owner of the whingy crying child I had heard pretty much constant since sunday aft), I had to put on a backless gown, so my naked bum was sticking out the back, and, thigh high white deep vein thrombosis socks, how very sexy ha! I had a cannula in my hand before leaving my room, which hurt, an injection in my thigh which also hurt, and then in the theatre, I cried my eyes out as they put me to sleep, was sooo painful!
I had quite bad pain immediately after waking up, but something they did made it almost disappear immediately, and it has just been mostly uncomfortable since. I had to move around from day one, just walking to and from the loo, then the next day I had to walk back to my apartment, haunched over like an old lady, ha. The days following were pretty much blah, bit uncomfy but nothing major till I had my drains out yesterday, again, I cried, It hurt alot, and it made the most awful noise, I am so glad they came out thow, looked and felt like an alien carrying round two long tubes with pods on the end with my blood in, eurgh. Oh and while changing my bandages today I had clean my bellybutton with a big cotton bud, its all numb and feels super wierd, and I can still feel the wadding now. After having my stuff off for a while today I am very aware of my incisions today, they do hurt abit and throb a fair bit, it hope it calms back donw tomorrow.
Anyway, super long post, but if anyone is interested in having a tummy tuck, there you go, I like to share.
I may pop out for some neccessities tomorrow, fingers crossed im feeling more normal.
Saturday 12 November 2011
Sunday 6 November 2011
birthday month, and theres alot on
Well I havn't posted anything in ages, and had been toying with writing a new post today, and then got a message from a very cool lady telling me about her new fashion blog here which is fab, I love her dress sense, she always looks fab, and loves quirky things like me!!
After reading her post about the new little black dress, I'm definately going to splurge out and get the dress I have had an eye on for ages!
I have had my eye on it for a couple of weeks after I saw it in some trashy celeb mag. (Dorothy Perkins btw) The model in the mag had coral coloured sky high stilettos on with it and it looked amazing, so if I buy the dress, obviously I have to buy some coral shoes, shame :) Well it is my birthday on the 26th, and I will be 26, so they wil be my pressie to me for being brave (see below) and shopping for the perfect shoes will give me something to do for the next 11 days :)
On another note, I am curled up on the sofa right now in an apartment in prague. You may know from earlier blogs that I dearly wanted a tummy tuck, well tuesday is TT day, flew into prague this afternoon, got a day of tests etc tomorrow (then must shop for after op munchables). I'm so excited, but also incredibly scared and nervous. It is nice though that on the table is a book of testimonials, and in it is one from a lady I had been chatting to on lookyourbest, she mustav stayed in the same apartment, which is fab. I do wish I wasn't alone, mainly because it is a little bit boring, and will be especially the first few days after when I can't really go anywhere, and so I had someone to hold my hand, but it is nice to just chill out away from everything. I am a scruff by the way, all the cushions from the couch are on the floor, I decided they were in the way, and a big soft pillow was preferable. Oh and I can't figure out how to work the tv, it goes all scrambly, thank god I had the foresight to make sure I had plenty to watch. On the downside, I have eaten far to much today, tut tut. Well will be back with another installment to moan about all the tests tomorrow no doubt. Over and out, moi
After reading her post about the new little black dress, I'm definately going to splurge out and get the dress I have had an eye on for ages!
I have had my eye on it for a couple of weeks after I saw it in some trashy celeb mag. (Dorothy Perkins btw) The model in the mag had coral coloured sky high stilettos on with it and it looked amazing, so if I buy the dress, obviously I have to buy some coral shoes, shame :) Well it is my birthday on the 26th, and I will be 26, so they wil be my pressie to me for being brave (see below) and shopping for the perfect shoes will give me something to do for the next 11 days :)
On another note, I am curled up on the sofa right now in an apartment in prague. You may know from earlier blogs that I dearly wanted a tummy tuck, well tuesday is TT day, flew into prague this afternoon, got a day of tests etc tomorrow (then must shop for after op munchables). I'm so excited, but also incredibly scared and nervous. It is nice though that on the table is a book of testimonials, and in it is one from a lady I had been chatting to on lookyourbest, she mustav stayed in the same apartment, which is fab. I do wish I wasn't alone, mainly because it is a little bit boring, and will be especially the first few days after when I can't really go anywhere, and so I had someone to hold my hand, but it is nice to just chill out away from everything. I am a scruff by the way, all the cushions from the couch are on the floor, I decided they were in the way, and a big soft pillow was preferable. Oh and I can't figure out how to work the tv, it goes all scrambly, thank god I had the foresight to make sure I had plenty to watch. On the downside, I have eaten far to much today, tut tut. Well will be back with another installment to moan about all the tests tomorrow no doubt. Over and out, moi
Wednesday 14 September 2011
Wednesday 31 August 2011
smile, because......I want to see...
the most beautiful smile you own is the one that reaches your eyes, it's just gorgeous
Wednesday 24 August 2011
Day 41 - Whatever tickles your fancy
Well....it's fortunate that there is no set subject for todays blog as I just want to have a right good rant.....I am pretty narked, it doesn't happen very often, I'm probably being overly dramatic, or overly something else that my annoyed brain can't think of right now, but I have to say I am quite annoyed.
Why I was so chuffed to be back speaking to "bud" the other week is beyond me, she's more hassle than it's worth. Chatting was great until she decides, oo I think I'll have a party on the 17th of sept, a pre wedding party and maybe tattooing. Nice idea, but I am going to the burlesque show, this has been decided since june, so I said I was dreadfully sorry, but I couldn't make it, and neither would Ria and Dave, but she would be welcome, with Chris, to join us, as there would be a whole bunch of us going, more the merrier and all that.
I knew, just knew as soon as I hit the send button that she would be narked, and I was sooo right. I get
'well if everyones gonna be going to burlesque, I'll just cancel, theres no point'.
NO thanks for the invite, which would have been polite....AND, we aren't her only friends, the fact that she never bloody speaks to us is proof of that, she's not a total hermit, can't she invite other friends?? And, her flipping facebook statuses do my nut in, all this 'I know who my real friends are, I know to never let someone get close to me apart from family, all the people I ever trusted let me down' crap. I can't be doing with it. Bloody attention seeking child. I used to be there for her, I used to sit up all night with her and comfort her, even when I thought she was in the wrong, and do everything that a best friend does. I'm not even invited to her wedding. So stuff her, she can go play 'woe is me' with more tolerable people, my patience with her has finally been extinguished, its been over two years coming, I'm finally done. I'm not being blamed for your relationship problems anymore, not being held responsible for you loosing touch with everyone, and not interested in whether you have been crying over something I have no control over. At one time I'dve done all that gladly because that's what I did. I don't have the energy to do it for you anymore, I need to be at least acknowledged if not appreciated.
That is all
I will prob delete this in a few days when I read it and decide what an idiot I sound, but I need to vent.
I wish it was at least a good vent.....
oh, and I almost forgot, you can't fooking spell, does my head in
Why I was so chuffed to be back speaking to "bud" the other week is beyond me, she's more hassle than it's worth. Chatting was great until she decides, oo I think I'll have a party on the 17th of sept, a pre wedding party and maybe tattooing. Nice idea, but I am going to the burlesque show, this has been decided since june, so I said I was dreadfully sorry, but I couldn't make it, and neither would Ria and Dave, but she would be welcome, with Chris, to join us, as there would be a whole bunch of us going, more the merrier and all that.
I knew, just knew as soon as I hit the send button that she would be narked, and I was sooo right. I get
'well if everyones gonna be going to burlesque, I'll just cancel, theres no point'.
NO thanks for the invite, which would have been polite....AND, we aren't her only friends, the fact that she never bloody speaks to us is proof of that, she's not a total hermit, can't she invite other friends?? And, her flipping facebook statuses do my nut in, all this 'I know who my real friends are, I know to never let someone get close to me apart from family, all the people I ever trusted let me down' crap. I can't be doing with it. Bloody attention seeking child. I used to be there for her, I used to sit up all night with her and comfort her, even when I thought she was in the wrong, and do everything that a best friend does. I'm not even invited to her wedding. So stuff her, she can go play 'woe is me' with more tolerable people, my patience with her has finally been extinguished, its been over two years coming, I'm finally done. I'm not being blamed for your relationship problems anymore, not being held responsible for you loosing touch with everyone, and not interested in whether you have been crying over something I have no control over. At one time I'dve done all that gladly because that's what I did. I don't have the energy to do it for you anymore, I need to be at least acknowledged if not appreciated.
That is all
I will prob delete this in a few days when I read it and decide what an idiot I sound, but I need to vent.
I wish it was at least a good vent.....
oh, and I almost forgot, you can't fooking spell, does my head in
Thursday 18 August 2011
Day 40 - A letter to someone deceased person you wish you could talk to
Hello Nana,
My god do I miss you.
Even though I have been in your house so many times since you have passed I still can't believe you have gone, I can just imagine that you are sat on the computer all quiet playing a game while we chat in the lounge, like we did. I know life moves on, but its heartbreaking for me watching your house change, that house was built for you, it pretty much grew around you, the whole family grew around you. It's different now...
Sometimes I can see that almost laugh expression that you made, and my stomach lurches and I feel sick, I will never see that again, it still reduces me to tears. It's funny how that is the main way I remember you, I guess it's a cheerful memory, it was always an expression you pulled when you had said some something cheeky, it was great, I think I have even started to mimic you, I catch myself doing it every now and then.
I don't believe in God, or heaven, or any kind of afterlife, but I like to think that you could see us, at least in the weeks just after you passed, sitting round the coffin telling stories, just like we did with grandad. You looked so peaceful, but so small, so so small. At least we filled your coffin with lots of things, I can imagine you were heavy to carry on the day, not because of you, but because of everything we sent you away with. Even a little bit of me went with you, and mum, so a little bit of us will be with you always. I have my little bit of you with me, I keep it safe, I always will. I have one of your pinnys by the way, and one of your dresses, I will wear it one day, I just wish you could see me in it, and I hope I do it justice.
Jasper is doing fine, he lives with Steven now, we decided it was best, as there he would get the most love and attention, he even has a rabbit to play with. Graham wanted to take him, but sat in the shop all day would be no life for him, and at the time mum just didn't think she could give him the attention he deserved. She has her own dog now, Jackson, he's a jackadoodle, cute as anything, stupid bundle of bumbling curly fur. Oh and she's having to have a hysterectomy by the way, I'm not sure whether you knew, I think she hid her problems once we knew you had cancer.
I feel like theres so much I need to tell you, you've only been gone since march, I have graduated, not greatly, but with honours. I have a job, and a new boyfriend (one that doesn't faff, you'd like him much more I'm sure). I keep myself fit, and my nails clean, I take so much more pride in myself lately. I've done a ton more drawings that I can't show you, and a bunch of fab things at the zoo.
Mainly I just want to tell you I love you, It was the last thing I ever said to you before you died, I know you knew I was there, you saw me for a brief moment, I burst into tears on my way out your room, as I knew that was the last time I'd see you alive, my words broke as I said them, but I know you heard me. I do love you Nana, a massive hole has been left in the family now. I wish you were here. I know life goes on, but it will never be the same.
Emer
xxxxxxxx
My god do I miss you.
Even though I have been in your house so many times since you have passed I still can't believe you have gone, I can just imagine that you are sat on the computer all quiet playing a game while we chat in the lounge, like we did. I know life moves on, but its heartbreaking for me watching your house change, that house was built for you, it pretty much grew around you, the whole family grew around you. It's different now...
Sometimes I can see that almost laugh expression that you made, and my stomach lurches and I feel sick, I will never see that again, it still reduces me to tears. It's funny how that is the main way I remember you, I guess it's a cheerful memory, it was always an expression you pulled when you had said some something cheeky, it was great, I think I have even started to mimic you, I catch myself doing it every now and then.
I don't believe in God, or heaven, or any kind of afterlife, but I like to think that you could see us, at least in the weeks just after you passed, sitting round the coffin telling stories, just like we did with grandad. You looked so peaceful, but so small, so so small. At least we filled your coffin with lots of things, I can imagine you were heavy to carry on the day, not because of you, but because of everything we sent you away with. Even a little bit of me went with you, and mum, so a little bit of us will be with you always. I have my little bit of you with me, I keep it safe, I always will. I have one of your pinnys by the way, and one of your dresses, I will wear it one day, I just wish you could see me in it, and I hope I do it justice.
Jasper is doing fine, he lives with Steven now, we decided it was best, as there he would get the most love and attention, he even has a rabbit to play with. Graham wanted to take him, but sat in the shop all day would be no life for him, and at the time mum just didn't think she could give him the attention he deserved. She has her own dog now, Jackson, he's a jackadoodle, cute as anything, stupid bundle of bumbling curly fur. Oh and she's having to have a hysterectomy by the way, I'm not sure whether you knew, I think she hid her problems once we knew you had cancer.
I feel like theres so much I need to tell you, you've only been gone since march, I have graduated, not greatly, but with honours. I have a job, and a new boyfriend (one that doesn't faff, you'd like him much more I'm sure). I keep myself fit, and my nails clean, I take so much more pride in myself lately. I've done a ton more drawings that I can't show you, and a bunch of fab things at the zoo.
Mainly I just want to tell you I love you, It was the last thing I ever said to you before you died, I know you knew I was there, you saw me for a brief moment, I burst into tears on my way out your room, as I knew that was the last time I'd see you alive, my words broke as I said them, but I know you heard me. I do love you Nana, a massive hole has been left in the family now. I wish you were here. I know life goes on, but it will never be the same.
Emer
xxxxxxxx
Wednesday 17 August 2011
today.....
I figured something.....I don't think I have ever been both this confident and this happy in my life. I have a fab man, fab friends and family, fab jobs, a fab figure(if I do say so myself), fab hair, and fab clothes. Everything isn't perfect, things are hard, I get crap money, but despite that it's bloody darn good. I hope things stay this way for a long time. It's not often I can remember being truly happy.
Monday 15 August 2011
Sunday 14 August 2011
Day 39: zodiac sign and do you think it fits your personality
I'm a sagittarian, the archer, and is commonly depicted as a centaur with a bow and arrow.
Optimistic and freedom-loving
Jovial and good-humoured
Honest and straightforward
Intellectual and philosophical
Thats what it says for a typical sagittarian. That is me to a t really. However it says on the bad side:
Blindly optimistic and careless
Irresponsible and superficial
Tactless and restless
I think I do possess some of these qualities, I dont think I'm particularly tactless, irresponsible or superficial though really. Reading through here what it says about how I should be according to my starsign, I agree on alot of aspects, although, I am not at all religious, in regards to me, that part is tosh.
Optimistic and freedom-loving
Jovial and good-humoured
Honest and straightforward
Intellectual and philosophical
Thats what it says for a typical sagittarian. That is me to a t really. However it says on the bad side:
Blindly optimistic and careless
Irresponsible and superficial
Tactless and restless
I think I do possess some of these qualities, I dont think I'm particularly tactless, irresponsible or superficial though really. Reading through here what it says about how I should be according to my starsign, I agree on alot of aspects, although, I am not at all religious, in regards to me, that part is tosh.
Wednesday 10 August 2011
Bucket List
This won't be complete now, I will probably add to it as I think of them......
1. Fall hopelessly in love
2. Swim with sharks
3. Hold a spider (a big hairy one)
4. Learn to drive
5. Own a classic car
6. Parachute jump
7. Bungee jump
8. Go somewhere naked
9. Go on holiday with no luggage
10. Get something I have written published
11. Perform/dance on a stage
12. Jump off a cliff/ cliff dive
13. Own a house
14. Dance in the rain...with someone I love
15. Sleep under the stars
16. Experience the rainforest
17. Go on safari
18. Ride a camel
19. Run into the sea on a cold day, naked (somewhere nice)
20. Make love in the rain
21. Change someones life
22. Water ski
23. Go deep sea diving
24. Go rock climbing
25. Milk a cow
26. Go bareback horse riding, along the beach
27. See a tornado
28. Experience an earthquake
29. Climb a huge tree
30. Surf
31. Go on holiday with someone I love
32. Walk(strut) down a catwalk
33. Drive in an open top car fast down a highway in america
34. Just drop everything and go on holiday that day
35. Send a love letter
36. Ride an elephant
37. Drive off road at night
38. Learn another language
39. Go to a festival
40. Climb a mountain
41. Gamble in a casino
42. See niagara falls
43. Ride a gondola in venice
44. Eat snails in france
45. Eat lobster
46. Hunt my own food
48. Participate in another county's festival
49. Fly a plane
50. Fly in a helicopter
51. Get lost in foreign country
52. Have champaigne for breakfast
53. Learn a musical instrument
54. Go into a wedding dress shop, try on loads of dresses, then tell the assistant I'm not getting married
55. Learn to bake bread
1. Fall hopelessly in love
2. Swim with sharks
3. Hold a spider (a big hairy one)
4. Learn to drive
5. Own a classic car
6. Parachute jump
7. Bungee jump
8. Go somewhere naked
9. Go on holiday with no luggage
10. Get something I have written published
11. Perform/dance on a stage
12. Jump off a cliff/ cliff dive
13. Own a house
14. Dance in the rain...with someone I love
15. Sleep under the stars
16. Experience the rainforest
17. Go on safari
18. Ride a camel
19. Run into the sea on a cold day, naked (somewhere nice)
20. Make love in the rain
21. Change someones life
22. Water ski
23. Go deep sea diving
24. Go rock climbing
25. Milk a cow
26. Go bareback horse riding, along the beach
27. See a tornado
28. Experience an earthquake
29. Climb a huge tree
30. Surf
31. Go on holiday with someone I love
32. Walk(strut) down a catwalk
33. Drive in an open top car fast down a highway in america
34. Just drop everything and go on holiday that day
35. Send a love letter
36. Ride an elephant
37. Drive off road at night
38. Learn another language
39. Go to a festival
40. Climb a mountain
41. Gamble in a casino
42. See niagara falls
43. Ride a gondola in venice
44. Eat snails in france
45. Eat lobster
46. Hunt my own food
48. Participate in another county's festival
49. Fly a plane
50. Fly in a helicopter
51. Get lost in foreign country
52. Have champaigne for breakfast
53. Learn a musical instrument
54. Go into a wedding dress shop, try on loads of dresses, then tell the assistant I'm not getting married
55. Learn to bake bread
Tuesday 9 August 2011
daily ramblings
It's great to be speaking to my bud again, its been a while, I'm hoping we can put the whatever, whenever, however behind us and just be mates again. It will always bug me not knowing, but life moves on, and I'd rather be friends than bear a grudge.
Today has been a hectic day, but mustnt grumble, I have a job, some wonderful people in my life, feeling good about myself and a roof over my head, so all the days trials are really nothing important in the grand scheme of things. Although, I have two paper stiches on my left arm that are a) ugly and b) stuck on really frigging well, and I don't wanna pull them off. I'm such a wet at times, I know this.
I'm having another curly hair day and I love it, feel like marilyn monroe, haha, but she had a much better figure, and probably dress sense.
oooo, I need to text Misty Moo, I have just ignored her texts today, how incredibly rude of me. best get to it.
Mucho love till tomorrow xx
Monday 8 August 2011
Day 38 - A photo of your parents
So now that that's done, I will digress. My arm kills, I thought I was ok, but the anaesthetic is wearing off, and good grief does it sting. I had my implanon taken out today, which is a two inch long piece of plastic implated under the skin that stops you having babies. I am a big wuss at times and have just lived with having it since I was about 16 because I was too scared of having it removed. Well I had to have a big injection done at the gum clinic today so thought I may aswel get them to take it out. I now have an achy bum cheek and a big bandage on my arm. Seems really wierd that when I take it off that the plastic thing will be gone, I used to mess with it all the time. Oh and I have to go for my first ever smear this week, not looking forward to it, oh the joys of being a woman. I feel like I have been super busy today, I nipped to matalan and bought some new underwears, nipped to steals to get some cheap tops for work, as I own barely any black stuff. My wardrobe used to consist of everything black, now I am much slimmer, its all about colour. And then spent an age in the gum clinic, I even had to do a wee in cup, to check for chlamydia, I had to go to the loo twice, apparantly weeing in a cup makes me nervous, so I couldn't go, ha. ooooooooo and I almost forgot, I sent an email off to Laderma saying that I will take their app on the 8th of nov if still available. I am SOOO excited, I know I'm never going to have an attractive stomach, but I know it will be better than the horrible sight it is now, and hell, if my scar gets me down, I'll just get a lovely tattoo over it in two years. Woo
Sunday 7 August 2011
Day 37 - A song that you like to dance to
well.....I started writing this blog on friday night, its now sunday afternoon, thats what two big glasses of wine and cranberry does to a girl, super easily lose my concentration. And I have been super busy, now I am working I seem to have no time, get up at 7:30 everyday ready for the hours walk to work, last night I had 5 minutes to myself before I had to get ready to go out, was a brill night though.
I've had a fab email today, I finally heard back from Laderma, where I have decided to have my op. They have advised that nothing should be done about my other niggle, disappointing, but have given me a quote for my tummy tuck, its gonna cost about 3500 euros all in (tuck, lipo, acc, tests and flights), thats fine woth me. I'm seriously considering booking it for the mid nov, (all ops are tuesdays). It would mean I would be out of action for my birthday, but all being well, it would be the best birthday present ever. I'm all of a sudden nervous as hell, I have been considering this for ages, but this is the furthest I have been, I have always just shrugged it off, I'm definately going for it this time. I'm going to double and triple check that prague is where I want to go, and then hopefully put my deposit down by the end of the week. wow, exciting.
To answer the question, I have many depending on what type of dance I am doing, my fave burlesque tracks to dance to, in terms of what I have been practicing routines for (I intend to audition next year) are:
because it's just really sexy, and really my style, I'm not cutesy at all, I like sultry and powerful, this is it. And for just fun, because its got a great beat to bump and wiggle to
For salsa I do like this, it has a nice beat, it's not too slow, you put some nice style in this one. I need to salsa more, once a week isn't enough
I do like to dance around to anything silly, on my bed in my underwear, its the most fun any girl can have in their bedroom on their own. Songs like Maroon 5- Sunday Morning, Christina - Somethings got a hold on me, lots and lots of cheese, pop, crap feel good music. Love it.
I've had a fab email today, I finally heard back from Laderma, where I have decided to have my op. They have advised that nothing should be done about my other niggle, disappointing, but have given me a quote for my tummy tuck, its gonna cost about 3500 euros all in (tuck, lipo, acc, tests and flights), thats fine woth me. I'm seriously considering booking it for the mid nov, (all ops are tuesdays). It would mean I would be out of action for my birthday, but all being well, it would be the best birthday present ever. I'm all of a sudden nervous as hell, I have been considering this for ages, but this is the furthest I have been, I have always just shrugged it off, I'm definately going for it this time. I'm going to double and triple check that prague is where I want to go, and then hopefully put my deposit down by the end of the week. wow, exciting.
To answer the question, I have many depending on what type of dance I am doing, my fave burlesque tracks to dance to, in terms of what I have been practicing routines for (I intend to audition next year) are:
because it's just really sexy, and really my style, I'm not cutesy at all, I like sultry and powerful, this is it. And for just fun, because its got a great beat to bump and wiggle to
For salsa I do like this, it has a nice beat, it's not too slow, you put some nice style in this one. I need to salsa more, once a week isn't enough
I do like to dance around to anything silly, on my bed in my underwear, its the most fun any girl can have in their bedroom on their own. Songs like Maroon 5- Sunday Morning, Christina - Somethings got a hold on me, lots and lots of cheese, pop, crap feel good music. Love it.
Thursday 4 August 2011
Day 36 - some hobbies of yours
Hmm, I like to draw, that has already been discussed. I love to dance, I always have, I've done lots of different types, ballet, tap, line, I'm currently into burlesque, which is way sexy for me, can't say I do it particularly well, but it's a great confidence booster. I also do salsa, which I have done this evening actually. Was lots of fun tonight, got the routine pretty well, got dragged onto the floor by Martin to some wierd one two one two step, which was fun. Then we did bachata, but its wierdly pronounced, like with an m, wierd, but you have to dance really close to your partner. I'm not really comfortable with people getting inside my bubble like that, I'm not sure why, as I quite happily go get in everybody else's.
I like to read, somedays I could just sit and get lost in a book for a whole day, I'll be mortified if they ever make films of my favourite books, that would ruin them for me, I have my own ideas of what everything in them looks, sounds and smells like, I don't need someone else to tell me.
Oh, and of course, I love to shop, if I had a job that involved shopping, that would be perfect, or even just try clothes on I'd do that day in day out and never ever get bored. I love shopping so much I did something yesterday that I have never ever done before, I bought a bag that matched my shoes, not like, I bought a bag in red coz my shoes are red, I mean, I bought a pair of purple and green Irregular Choice shoes, and bought a perfectly matching purple and green Irregular Choice.....wait for it, clutch! I think I have a problem......
I like to read, somedays I could just sit and get lost in a book for a whole day, I'll be mortified if they ever make films of my favourite books, that would ruin them for me, I have my own ideas of what everything in them looks, sounds and smells like, I don't need someone else to tell me.
Oh, and of course, I love to shop, if I had a job that involved shopping, that would be perfect, or even just try clothes on I'd do that day in day out and never ever get bored. I love shopping so much I did something yesterday that I have never ever done before, I bought a bag that matched my shoes, not like, I bought a bag in red coz my shoes are red, I mean, I bought a pair of purple and green Irregular Choice shoes, and bought a perfectly matching purple and green Irregular Choice.....wait for it, clutch! I think I have a problem......
Day 35 - A letter to your ex
Hmmm, who should I write this to, I've already written to one in an earlier post, I have something I would like to say to most of them really, like I'd like ask Andy why he neglected to let me know that he had no intention of returning from New Zealand and why he just stopped emailing me back. I'd like to know who the hell the other Andy thinks he was not only doing all the other evil things mentioned in the previous post, but also cheating on me and leaving me with a massive debt, and I'd like to know why Kyle is still pumping himself full of drugs which are no doubt gonna kill him sooner or later. But anyway, because of today, I think I'd really like to write to Darryll. So....
Dear Darryll
It was actually good chatting to you today, I appreciated that you came round and didn't start just putting me down, or making me feel bad like you did so many times in the last few months. I am sorry that I have moved on faster than you, not because I'm not happy, because I am, but I just don't want you to think that I didn't consider you to be important to me, you took two years of my life, I will always care for you, and you will always be important in some way, and I saw your eyes when we spoke, I know you still have feelings for me, if not still love me. I hold no bitterness anymore, I know you regret what you did, as do I, for as much as I knew I wasn't happy anymore, I shouldn'tve handled it the way I did, but I did the only way I felt I could, and I'm sorry. I have to say though, I never lied to you, even if I didn't tell you everything. I know you noticed that I stopped saying 'I love you'. That's because I stopped meaning it, I couldn't say it just to try and make things easy, that would have been unfair on both of us, I hated myself everytime you said it and I simply answered with 'I know', or 'yes'. Nothing you ever did could hurt me more than that. But at least I was true to myself.
You looked good, you had obviously made more of an effort that I think I had ever seen in the time together, I could tell you were taking better care of yourself, and I don't know whether it was for my benefit or not, but I could tell you'd made more of an effort in what you wearing tonight.
I do hope that you find someone who is more suited to you than me, you have alot to give, I can't ever say that I didn't feel loved, I did, but I hope you learnt from me that you need to channel the way that you show someone better. I hope it doesn't take you to long, you deserve to be happy. Next time you tell people things like the idea of marrying, or living with someone doesn't scare you, why don't you take that big leap and prove it, I'm glad you didn't with me, it would have made things harder. You need to make a move to move out of caths spare bedroom when you next find someone, no matter how much I loved you, I couldn'tve coped with that much longer, it was like a prison. And remember, don't ever buy a girl a ring until that ring hold that resonance, you said many times that you wanted to buy me a ring, and I always asked you to never buy one. I have an intelligent head on my shoulders, a fair few ladies I know feel the same. Bless you, you can be niave at times.
Anyway, enough rambling on........enjoy amsterdam, and enjoy your life, and I hope one day we can be friends.
Emer
and btw, I send my wishes for your folks, I know its hard, but chin up, and I hope everything works out
Dear Darryll
It was actually good chatting to you today, I appreciated that you came round and didn't start just putting me down, or making me feel bad like you did so many times in the last few months. I am sorry that I have moved on faster than you, not because I'm not happy, because I am, but I just don't want you to think that I didn't consider you to be important to me, you took two years of my life, I will always care for you, and you will always be important in some way, and I saw your eyes when we spoke, I know you still have feelings for me, if not still love me. I hold no bitterness anymore, I know you regret what you did, as do I, for as much as I knew I wasn't happy anymore, I shouldn'tve handled it the way I did, but I did the only way I felt I could, and I'm sorry. I have to say though, I never lied to you, even if I didn't tell you everything. I know you noticed that I stopped saying 'I love you'. That's because I stopped meaning it, I couldn't say it just to try and make things easy, that would have been unfair on both of us, I hated myself everytime you said it and I simply answered with 'I know', or 'yes'. Nothing you ever did could hurt me more than that. But at least I was true to myself.
You looked good, you had obviously made more of an effort that I think I had ever seen in the time together, I could tell you were taking better care of yourself, and I don't know whether it was for my benefit or not, but I could tell you'd made more of an effort in what you wearing tonight.
I do hope that you find someone who is more suited to you than me, you have alot to give, I can't ever say that I didn't feel loved, I did, but I hope you learnt from me that you need to channel the way that you show someone better. I hope it doesn't take you to long, you deserve to be happy. Next time you tell people things like the idea of marrying, or living with someone doesn't scare you, why don't you take that big leap and prove it, I'm glad you didn't with me, it would have made things harder. You need to make a move to move out of caths spare bedroom when you next find someone, no matter how much I loved you, I couldn'tve coped with that much longer, it was like a prison. And remember, don't ever buy a girl a ring until that ring hold that resonance, you said many times that you wanted to buy me a ring, and I always asked you to never buy one. I have an intelligent head on my shoulders, a fair few ladies I know feel the same. Bless you, you can be niave at times.
Anyway, enough rambling on........enjoy amsterdam, and enjoy your life, and I hope one day we can be friends.
Emer
and btw, I send my wishes for your folks, I know its hard, but chin up, and I hope everything works out
Tuesday 2 August 2011
Day 34: Your favourite quote
ooooooooo, this is a hard-y, I am the quote queen. I love quotes, I make posters with them, I advertise with them, live by them, and use them, often. My favourite is this
'it does not do to dwell on dreams and forget to live'
its by Dumbledore in the Philosopher's Stone. It's a good one, it doesn't do anyone good to ponder or think to much and not just do things, wasting precious time. I've been doing that way too much of late,I hate myself for it.
I have loads more in the quote bin that is my brain
'the only difference between tattooed people and non tattooed people is, that tattooed people don't care that you have no tattoos'
'risk everything, fear nothing'
and I don't care what anyone says, I do stand by this from Marilyn Monroe
'I'm selfish, impatient and a little insecure....I make mistakes. I am out of control..and at times hard to handle. But if you can't handle me at my worst, you sure as hell don't deserve me at my best'
Because to me it means, that I'm not always going to be perfect and happy, I know myself to be sometimes selfish, I do make mistakes, I don't trust anyone, I put up walls, I cry, I hide and deny things exist, including me, I am insecure, I can be demanding, I sometimes do or say the wrong thing, or do or say nothing when I should have done something, but if someone cant take the worst of me, then they really don't deserve the best of me, I come as a package, rough with the smooth, I'll take all your faults if you'll take mine, but I'm sure as hell that I more than make up suffering me at my worst, by being my best the rest of the time.
and because I just like to right about stuff, I've had quite an ok day today, first day on the new job wasn't so bad, the people were nice enough, the horrid feeling in the pit of my stomach ebbed away abit, and I came out looking hotter than I went in if I do say so myself :) got a few wolf whistles on my way home, ha.
'it does not do to dwell on dreams and forget to live'
its by Dumbledore in the Philosopher's Stone. It's a good one, it doesn't do anyone good to ponder or think to much and not just do things, wasting precious time. I've been doing that way too much of late,I hate myself for it.
I have loads more in the quote bin that is my brain
'the only difference between tattooed people and non tattooed people is, that tattooed people don't care that you have no tattoos'
'risk everything, fear nothing'
'I'm selfish, impatient and a little insecure....I make mistakes. I am out of control..and at times hard to handle. But if you can't handle me at my worst, you sure as hell don't deserve me at my best'
Because to me it means, that I'm not always going to be perfect and happy, I know myself to be sometimes selfish, I do make mistakes, I don't trust anyone, I put up walls, I cry, I hide and deny things exist, including me, I am insecure, I can be demanding, I sometimes do or say the wrong thing, or do or say nothing when I should have done something, but if someone cant take the worst of me, then they really don't deserve the best of me, I come as a package, rough with the smooth, I'll take all your faults if you'll take mine, but I'm sure as hell that I more than make up suffering me at my worst, by being my best the rest of the time.
and because I just like to right about stuff, I've had quite an ok day today, first day on the new job wasn't so bad, the people were nice enough, the horrid feeling in the pit of my stomach ebbed away abit, and I came out looking hotter than I went in if I do say so myself :) got a few wolf whistles on my way home, ha.
Monday 1 August 2011
i wish.....
I'd listened to what you said better, because each time I have to relive it, it still makes no sense
my monday....
all things considered today has been quite a nice day. I made a new friend, well, I made a better friend of an existing one. He took me out for a drink and let me offload, I needed to, and I needed perspective, and brutal honesty, it was good. I've also been and had a nosey in the salon, wow that place needs an overhaul, the stock room is a dump, the reception has a layer of dust that things could live in and the windows are bare, I love organising, its gonna take me a week or so to get into it, but it'll be running smooth as my skin (teehee) in no time at all. I'm nervous as hell, however, I know I am gonna love it. Gonna be wierd having a job thow.
I plucked up the courage to speak to dad about what I want to do, he said, its my money and I can do what I want, so contacting the clinic tonight and will get the ball rolling, maybe for october, I need to have worked in the salon a couple of months before I take 10 days off.
Oh and it absolutely bucketed it down around 7pm, I sat and listened to it for ages until it died down, and then when it got worse again, I put my shorts on and went and just stood in it, and felt the droplets run over my bare skin, it was cold, invigorating and just felt amazing. I span around on the spot a few times, then did some hula hooping, which is really hard in the rain, but being so wet and playing like that made me feel really sexy. I love the rain so much,
I love the look of my skin in the rain, I love my hair when its hanging round my face, soaking. Im sat here right now blogging in a soaking wet vest, dripping hair and droplets all over my shoulders, I feel ace....I feel fearless. I would never usually just stand in it alone, I would want to go walking in it with someone, because on my own I feel stupid, but not today.
So many simple things that have made the day good. but remember
I plucked up the courage to speak to dad about what I want to do, he said, its my money and I can do what I want, so contacting the clinic tonight and will get the ball rolling, maybe for october, I need to have worked in the salon a couple of months before I take 10 days off.
Oh and it absolutely bucketed it down around 7pm, I sat and listened to it for ages until it died down, and then when it got worse again, I put my shorts on and went and just stood in it, and felt the droplets run over my bare skin, it was cold, invigorating and just felt amazing. I span around on the spot a few times, then did some hula hooping, which is really hard in the rain, but being so wet and playing like that made me feel really sexy. I love the rain so much,
I love the look of my skin in the rain, I love my hair when its hanging round my face, soaking. Im sat here right now blogging in a soaking wet vest, dripping hair and droplets all over my shoulders, I feel ace....I feel fearless. I would never usually just stand in it alone, I would want to go walking in it with someone, because on my own I feel stupid, but not today.
So many simple things that have made the day good. but remember
Day 33 - What are you craving right now
I have to say, before I begin, I'm pretty impressed with myself for keeping this up. I know it has been in spits and spats, but I'm still going. I'm rubbish at sticking to anything, heck I started taking vitamins a couple of weeks ago as people were telling me that I will make myself ill, and even though I have them on the middle of the dining room table where I can see them millions of times a day, I still don't take them. I can be absolutely rubbish at times. I think I'll take one now, (all things considered I should take about 5, but it says one a day on the bottle, I don't mess with printed instructions). Well I'm back, I compromised and took 2.
Anyway, and to the question in hand, what am I craving right now, well I've just had a milkybar so I really do not want any food now at all. I know what I really really want though, a tummy tuck, I've been looking into it all morning, I've chosen a surgeon, now all I need to do is speak to dad about using some of my saves. Doing this would make me really happy, I know it's only skin, but I hate it so much if I thought I would live through I would hack it away myself. I'm an incredibly strong person (both physically and mentally surprisingly) but my stomach makes me weak, it ruins me, it ruins things, all I want to be is happy. Money, fame, glory, and material things are unimportant, I want nothing more than to be happy, so I just need to work up a few ounces of courage and speak to dad. I'll do it now, while I'm feeling strong, my resolve won't last all day.
Over and out, moi
Anyway, and to the question in hand, what am I craving right now, well I've just had a milkybar so I really do not want any food now at all. I know what I really really want though, a tummy tuck, I've been looking into it all morning, I've chosen a surgeon, now all I need to do is speak to dad about using some of my saves. Doing this would make me really happy, I know it's only skin, but I hate it so much if I thought I would live through I would hack it away myself. I'm an incredibly strong person (both physically and mentally surprisingly) but my stomach makes me weak, it ruins me, it ruins things, all I want to be is happy. Money, fame, glory, and material things are unimportant, I want nothing more than to be happy, so I just need to work up a few ounces of courage and speak to dad. I'll do it now, while I'm feeling strong, my resolve won't last all day.
Over and out, moi
Sunday 31 July 2011
awww
actually, I think this is amazing(I need to stop reading this damn girls blog, its making me all weird). I think I tick alot of this list, and I think everyone who happens across this should take note.
I'm sure it's really something to do with me, I want to cry, but my tears are to precious....maybe the book is right, and he just wasn't/isn't that in to me
Day 32 - A photo you took
This....is me. I had fun this weekend at the tutti fruitti festival. It was great to dance to old rock music, try on lots of vintage wear and just generally be silly with my bud. These aren't my sunnies, they were for sale in the vintage shop, and they were silly, so naturally, I had to put them on and be equally silly. Sunnies can hide alot........
Oh, and I follow some girls blog who always writes, or finds beautiful things, and this is what I read today, I love it, and it fits me. I never used to be who I am now, the last few years of my life have changed me so much. So many people have said to me, yeah you look different, but you're still the same person. Not really, yeah, I've always been kind, considerate, friendly and abit daft, but past that, I'm completely different. But alot of things have happened to me in the last few years to change me, Even I wouldn't recognise me now, if old me met new me. I like the new me so much more.
I don't know who's quote this is mind...I may have added a few lines myself
Saturday 30 July 2011
today.....
I am going to be fearless, its all I need to be. And myself of course, and no-one is better at doing it than me.
Day 31- whatever tickles your fancy
To me, fearless is not the absence of fear. It’s not being completely unafraid. To me, fearless is having fears. fearless is having doubts. Lots of them. To me, fearless is living in spite of those things that scare you to death. fearless is falling madly in love again, even though you’ve been hurt before. fearless is walking into your freshmen year of high school at fifteen. fearless is getting back up and fighting for what you want over and over again… even though every time you’ve tried before, you’ve lost. It’s fearless to have faith that someday things will change. fearless is having the courage to say goodbye to someone who only hurts you, even if you can’t breathe without them. I think it’s fearless to fall for your best friend, even though he’s in love with someone else. And when someone apologizes to you enough times for things they’ll never stop doing, I think it’s fearless to stop believing them. It’s fearless to say “you’re NOT sorry”, and walk away. I think loving someone despite what people think is fearless. I think allowing yourself to cry on the bathroom floor is fearless. Letting go is fearless. Then, moving on and being alright…that’s fearless too. But no matter what love throws at you, you have to believe in it. You have to believe in love stories and prince charmings and happily ever after. That’s why I write these songs. Because I think love is fearless.
~Taylor Swift
~Taylor Swift
Thursday 28 July 2011
just because, and poss day 30.....see how it goes
Well, I'm feeling odd right now, like the deflated feeling after waiting for something big to happen. Like christmas for instance, which is the biggest day of the year and when its all over it feels like..."was it really all worth it". I feel like that, but it really hasn't been one of those days. I had the best day at the zoo, I mean, I can't say I get particularly excited about doing cutouts, but the silhouette for the "meet the lemurs" was cute to do, I always always no matter what I am doing enjoy my days at the zoo, but the highlight had to be meeting the sealions, it was the most awesome thing I have got to do to date, I did a few training things, and give Anya (I think) it was a good stroke (they feel really weird), and then got an extra special treat which I'm not allowed to say. It was fabulous anyway.
Then mum and dave came round to drop off my dress and talk me through the ins and outs of the salon, as I start work there on tues as marketing/manager/receptionist/kick everyones arse into gear and stop the staff taking the mick person. wow, exhaustive, it's basically a business that really needs someone to go in and turn it around, and I am really logically minded, straightforward and honest which makes me a good candidate, I am the nicest person in the world, but I really don't take crap off people. Plus I'm probably the only one with enough pennies in the bank to stand the poor wage until it actually starts making a profit. To be honest though, money aside, I look forward to the challenge, if I can turn this business around, I can turn any around. Life to me really isn't about money, if I have enough to get by, I'm happy, if I need more, I'll make more some other way, I have always always landed on my feet, and I am very resourceful, so I am confident that I will be fine.
Hmm, day 30, it's write a letter to the friendliest person you knew for one day. I really can't think of anyone, I know loads of friendly people, but generally know them for more than one day. The only person I can think of is the guy who helped me out when I was trying to get back from manchester about 6 weeks ago. I'd bought my ticket online, but nowhere online did it tell me that I could only pick up my ticket from piccadilly, and stopping at a mates just out of manc, victoria was easiest so I was dropped off there. After some rudeness from the ticket lady, I got on a tram to piccadilly, had no idea where I was going (geography is my weakest subject) and some guy helped me, and chatted to me untill I got to my platform, which was really sweet. It's funny as something about him at the time just....I dunno, kinda made me feel like I had met the man of my dreams, there was just something about him you know, kinda like in the movies where people meet someone amazing somewhere random, like that. But when he walked away, he didn't once look back, so, obviously....it was just me. Well I believe that things like that really happen, and when you know love, truly, it tears through every fiber of your being and you just know. I cant say it was love at first sight, ha, it wasn't, but it was something, and at abit of a low point for me, it was enough. So a guess a letter to him would be
Dear Gentleman who helped me that day
Thankyou very much for being kind, and helpful and friendly, you have no idea how much I appreciated it, and just thanks for being there, as that feeling I had for you for that day, restored a little hope and life in someone a little bit broken.
Emer
wow, abit deep for me, where did that come from
Hmm, day 30, it's write a letter to the friendliest person you knew for one day. I really can't think of anyone, I know loads of friendly people, but generally know them for more than one day. The only person I can think of is the guy who helped me out when I was trying to get back from manchester about 6 weeks ago. I'd bought my ticket online, but nowhere online did it tell me that I could only pick up my ticket from piccadilly, and stopping at a mates just out of manc, victoria was easiest so I was dropped off there. After some rudeness from the ticket lady, I got on a tram to piccadilly, had no idea where I was going (geography is my weakest subject) and some guy helped me, and chatted to me untill I got to my platform, which was really sweet. It's funny as something about him at the time just....I dunno, kinda made me feel like I had met the man of my dreams, there was just something about him you know, kinda like in the movies where people meet someone amazing somewhere random, like that. But when he walked away, he didn't once look back, so, obviously....it was just me. Well I believe that things like that really happen, and when you know love, truly, it tears through every fiber of your being and you just know. I cant say it was love at first sight, ha, it wasn't, but it was something, and at abit of a low point for me, it was enough. So a guess a letter to him would be
Dear Gentleman who helped me that day
Thankyou very much for being kind, and helpful and friendly, you have no idea how much I appreciated it, and just thanks for being there, as that feeling I had for you for that day, restored a little hope and life in someone a little bit broken.
Emer
wow, abit deep for me, where did that come from
Thursday 21 July 2011
just a quickie before bed :)
haha
A quick post as a certain (rather sexy) somebody pointed out that I hadn't blogged for a while, so seeing as today has been a good day, I will share.
Zoo days are always good, thats a given (although dreadfully disappointed that after next week I'm being dropped to once a month as I'm not needed so much, big sad face), but today was extra good as I had a mcdonalds (disgusting I know, but tastes soo good) and then.........I went to watch the final Potter movie.
It was soo good, I thoroughly LOVED it, and will go and watch it again no doubt. I have to admit, I cried, on at least 2 occassions, jumped once or twice, laughed, applauded, oh yes, it had everything!
However, I was not particularly impressed when the guy who served me my cinema tickets told me that my tattoo on my arm was not a dark mark, as only the one cast in the sky is called a dark mark! WRONG they are both dark marks, don't doubt the girl with the tattoo, I know, I've done my research, I'm the big potter geek thank.you.very.much. and I'm a girl, so always right anyway........
Oh and must add, my day ended with an as always, very nice fonecall with a very nice Mr (mentioned twice now see for effect :) ...), so all round happy lady.
Life is good at the moment really, and tomorrow (weather permitting for part) I'm sure is going to be an awesome day also.
TTFN xxx
A quick post as a certain (rather sexy) somebody pointed out that I hadn't blogged for a while, so seeing as today has been a good day, I will share.
Zoo days are always good, thats a given (although dreadfully disappointed that after next week I'm being dropped to once a month as I'm not needed so much, big sad face), but today was extra good as I had a mcdonalds (disgusting I know, but tastes soo good) and then.........I went to watch the final Potter movie.
It was soo good, I thoroughly LOVED it, and will go and watch it again no doubt. I have to admit, I cried, on at least 2 occassions, jumped once or twice, laughed, applauded, oh yes, it had everything!
However, I was not particularly impressed when the guy who served me my cinema tickets told me that my tattoo on my arm was not a dark mark, as only the one cast in the sky is called a dark mark! WRONG they are both dark marks, don't doubt the girl with the tattoo, I know, I've done my research, I'm the big potter geek thank.you.very.much. and I'm a girl, so always right anyway........
Oh and must add, my day ended with an as always, very nice fonecall with a very nice Mr (mentioned twice now see for effect :) ...), so all round happy lady.
Life is good at the moment really, and tomorrow (weather permitting for part) I'm sure is going to be an awesome day also.
TTFN xxx
Wednesday 13 July 2011
Day 29: Provide the hex code of my favourite colour
Err no, my favourite colour is red, it actually has a name 'red' and if u really wanna be geeky C-0 M-99 Y-100 K-0. Hex code....pah
Tuesday 12 July 2011
Day 28: Favourite places to shop.
Wow, I wrote the title to this ages ago, but got distracted, oooh look a kitty...what??
Ha, no wonder I never get anything done! Anyway, my fav places to shop. I'm not sure I want to do this one today....I may come across as a scumbag, which I'm not really, just savvy. Alright, I do like carbooting, and when I say like, I mean love! ha, I must admit though, I rarely spend money on buying myself things these days, I pick up things that I know will make a killing on ebay so I have pennies to buy the things I want from ebay, like all the pretty corsets I have bought recently. I think I'd make a great business woman, I know how to barter, I know what to buy, and I know how to sell, genius me! :)
Anyway that'll do today, been a few long and probably arduous posts over the last few days so keeping this one short and sweet, like me :)
Ha, no wonder I never get anything done! Anyway, my fav places to shop. I'm not sure I want to do this one today....I may come across as a scumbag, which I'm not really, just savvy. Alright, I do like carbooting, and when I say like, I mean love! ha, I must admit though, I rarely spend money on buying myself things these days, I pick up things that I know will make a killing on ebay so I have pennies to buy the things I want from ebay, like all the pretty corsets I have bought recently. I think I'd make a great business woman, I know how to barter, I know what to buy, and I know how to sell, genius me! :)
Anyway that'll do today, been a few long and probably arduous posts over the last few days so keeping this one short and sweet, like me :)
Monday 11 July 2011
Wooop Wooop
I did it, (what you ask....see back to the suicide mission post) well not as well as I would have wished, but did it nonetheless. Met up with Jen and we ran round the park with 1 stop (tbh, I think we couldave done the whole way had she not had leg pain), which is approx 2 miles, I then part jogged, part walked to meet my friends at the De'Vere, and hung around for for a few mins (and went for a wee, in the hotel naturally). Then we set off round the De'Vere which is another 3 miles. I may have been jogging so slow that an old man with a stick could have over taken me, but I was still jogging! All the way round with no stops, a few 'ARGGHHHH's and 'get your ass up this hill emma' but I did it. Feel really good, a little wobbly, but really good. I'll soon be doing twice round the De'Vere with no stops, thats my next feat when I have mastered this, oh and speed, I've proven I have stamina, need speed!
Anyway, I feel good, nothings gonna stop me now, might think about doing a marathon in a few years!
Anyway, I feel good, nothings gonna stop me now, might think about doing a marathon in a few years!
Day 27: A talent of yours
Well singing of course, lalalalalalalalalala, voice of an angel me :)
Pffft, my dad confirmed my suspicions when I said the other day "Dad, can I sing?" and his reply was "hmmmm" Ta very much dad, he could've at least humoured me. Oh well, I'd like to think I can sing, even if only a little bit, I think it'd be ace to be a singer, but alas, I guess it's not meant to be.
I can however draw, like properly so you can tell what something is, not like some of this abstract artists who put a coloured line on a canvas and everyone coos round it like they have never seen so much talent all crammed into one piece of 'art'. My tutor pretty much confirmed this crazy idea that this sortof stuff is marvelous when I was trying to defend myself (for a change) and I mentioned that I can draw. The words that followed from her made me want to throw a cup of something hot down her dress. "well, we can all draw" erm no, no we can't. If nothing else that comment made me feel like my talent was worthless...we can all draw, hmmphhh.
Anyway, proof! I can draw in lots of different styles, I was a tattooist a while back, and at that time my drawings were very clean, with harsh lines that took me forever to perfect (I am a perfectionist you see, if the line is wrong I will redo it again and again until just right in those type of drawings, I've loosened up abit now). I still draw like this from time to time when people commission me to draw them tattoos (which reminds me, I have two of which I need to do).
Don't steal please, it's copywrited to me.
Recently I have got into drawing women, they are soo beautiful to draw, and you can have so much fun with them. My favourite is this one, I love fantasy stuff, and I think it's so delicate, I have actually started painting it, which I will post another time. There are flaws, I know, like the hands, and the face isn't brilliant, but I love it all the same.
Long post I'm sorry but I am passionate about drawing, so bear with me.
Over the last few weeks I have started drawing more stylized women, pin up's etc like this power dressing pin up, and my most recent burlesque (taken from a photo)
And finally, I would like to post this, as I am sure I remember rightly (hopes), this is someones favourite, or at least one he likes of mine, so it definately makes it worthy of a place here. It is just a cat illustration that I did when I was doing a disney brief at college :) Cat is making a love spell that smells really good, I coloured it to.
Pffft, my dad confirmed my suspicions when I said the other day "Dad, can I sing?" and his reply was "hmmmm" Ta very much dad, he could've at least humoured me. Oh well, I'd like to think I can sing, even if only a little bit, I think it'd be ace to be a singer, but alas, I guess it's not meant to be.
I can however draw, like properly so you can tell what something is, not like some of this abstract artists who put a coloured line on a canvas and everyone coos round it like they have never seen so much talent all crammed into one piece of 'art'. My tutor pretty much confirmed this crazy idea that this sortof stuff is marvelous when I was trying to defend myself (for a change) and I mentioned that I can draw. The words that followed from her made me want to throw a cup of something hot down her dress. "well, we can all draw" erm no, no we can't. If nothing else that comment made me feel like my talent was worthless...we can all draw, hmmphhh.
Anyway, proof! I can draw in lots of different styles, I was a tattooist a while back, and at that time my drawings were very clean, with harsh lines that took me forever to perfect (I am a perfectionist you see, if the line is wrong I will redo it again and again until just right in those type of drawings, I've loosened up abit now). I still draw like this from time to time when people commission me to draw them tattoos (which reminds me, I have two of which I need to do).
Recently I have got into drawing women, they are soo beautiful to draw, and you can have so much fun with them. My favourite is this one, I love fantasy stuff, and I think it's so delicate, I have actually started painting it, which I will post another time. There are flaws, I know, like the hands, and the face isn't brilliant, but I love it all the same.
Over the last few weeks I have started drawing more stylized women, pin up's etc like this power dressing pin up, and my most recent burlesque (taken from a photo)
And finally, I would like to post this, as I am sure I remember rightly (hopes), this is someones favourite, or at least one he likes of mine, so it definately makes it worthy of a place here. It is just a cat illustration that I did when I was doing a disney brief at college :) Cat is making a love spell that smells really good, I coloured it to.
Sunday 10 July 2011
Tomorrows agenda....suicide mission at its finest!
So thats a big fat lie, well part of it, the title suggests something quite exciting, I can assure you, it really isn't, not at all, but I'm excited.
So........I bet you're just dying to know what it is, ha. Doubtful, but anyway, I have just agreed to run round the park tomorrow at 5:30, which is fine......I have to say though, I have already been booked to run round the De'Vere at 6:15, which put together is around 5miles, 2 more than I have only just managed to do without stopping! OH MY GOD! what have I done...
Well the challenge has been set now, so I must do it, and I will feel amazing if I manage it, so I gonna try my damnedest. If I haven't blogged again by tuesday ring the authorites, I may be dead. In fact scratch that, ring Misty, she'll know where to look.
I'm sooo dramatic, I'll prob be just fine, at best, I will do it and be chuffed to bits with myself, and at worst, I'll have to do stop starts round the De'Vere with Pete and Della and just let Misty and myself down, but at least I'll have tried.
Watch this space for updates xx
Oh and btw I have noticed my spelling and grammer seems to be back on form, I'm using capital letters and everything.
ooo, and I've just remembered, I've found my sports bra which will be way more comfortable! I just hope it still fits.
ooo, and I've just remembered, I've found my sports bra which will be way more comfortable! I just hope it still fits.
Day 26: My favourite books
Now this one I can actually answer without fumbling round some excuse, as I do read alot, this may be a loooong list, we shall see. I (apparantly shamefully) admit that I am currently reading Paul O'Grady's autobiography, which is wonderfully funny, but then I love him, and I miss Buster, such a shame.
Being the 25 year old child that am, Harry Potter is top of the list (I am sure if you know me, or in fact even heard of me, you will know that I am a mahoosive Potter geek). I'm not sure which is my favourite book, the first had to be amazing, because, well it's the first. But I think the Order of The Phoenix is prob the best for fight scenes, shame the film really didnt live up to the book on that.....they tried, somewhat.
My favourite author is actually Raymond Feist (which reminds me, I think he has a new book out that I don't have). I have read (and own) nearly all of his, and theres alot, they all relate somehow, apart from all being set in the same world, characters appear in one set from others, even if they are hundreds of years later. But then you expect that from wizardry I guess.
And finally I love The Fifth Sorceress by Robert Newcomb, more magicy stuff. It's soo good, and really graphic in places. Its the first one of a trilogy, and all three are amazing, and I'm pretty sure there's a second trilogy that carries on the story but I'm struggling to get them, or at least I was last time I looked.
Well I think thats a pretty comprehensive list, there are more, but must not bore people I guess.
On a side note, I feel dreadfully hungover today, which is all kinds of bizarre seeing as unless someone spiked my 37p bottle of lemonade last nite, I havn't touched a drop of alcohol since friday night. (Maybe all the wines and martinis that I wasn't going to have has caught up with me).
Until the next....goodbye :) x
Oh, and I think this may be a good post to say.....I do believe in dragons....
Being the 25 year old child that am, Harry Potter is top of the list (I am sure if you know me, or in fact even heard of me, you will know that I am a mahoosive Potter geek). I'm not sure which is my favourite book, the first had to be amazing, because, well it's the first. But I think the Order of The Phoenix is prob the best for fight scenes, shame the film really didnt live up to the book on that.....they tried, somewhat.
My favourite author is actually Raymond Feist (which reminds me, I think he has a new book out that I don't have). I have read (and own) nearly all of his, and theres alot, they all relate somehow, apart from all being set in the same world, characters appear in one set from others, even if they are hundreds of years later. But then you expect that from wizardry I guess.
And finally I love The Fifth Sorceress by Robert Newcomb, more magicy stuff. It's soo good, and really graphic in places. Its the first one of a trilogy, and all three are amazing, and I'm pretty sure there's a second trilogy that carries on the story but I'm struggling to get them, or at least I was last time I looked.
Well I think thats a pretty comprehensive list, there are more, but must not bore people I guess.
On a side note, I feel dreadfully hungover today, which is all kinds of bizarre seeing as unless someone spiked my 37p bottle of lemonade last nite, I havn't touched a drop of alcohol since friday night. (Maybe all the wines and martinis that I wasn't going to have has caught up with me).
Until the next....goodbye :) x
Oh, and I think this may be a good post to say.....I do believe in dragons....
Saturday 9 July 2011
Day 25: A letter to someone you judged by their first impression
Yes I can count, I didnt like day 24 so decided not to bother, and its my blog, so I can do what I want.
So, todays blog, hmm. This is actually quite hard, and for as long as I can remember I try to give people the benefit of the doubt and not judge them by first impression, I guess I hope that people will be just as forgiving with me, because I know that I am not my best all the time,so neither are others, its only fair to give people a chance.
Well, im barely into this post and already failing miserably.
Oh well, I think I'll leave it there and just admit defeat on this one, I am soo rubbish at times. Maybe tomorrow will be better.
However, I am having the most excellent week, and its not even finished yet, so I can cope with failing on this one :)
So, todays blog, hmm. This is actually quite hard, and for as long as I can remember I try to give people the benefit of the doubt and not judge them by first impression, I guess I hope that people will be just as forgiving with me, because I know that I am not my best all the time,so neither are others, its only fair to give people a chance.
Well, im barely into this post and already failing miserably.
Oh well, I think I'll leave it there and just admit defeat on this one, I am soo rubbish at times. Maybe tomorrow will be better.
However, I am having the most excellent week, and its not even finished yet, so I can cope with failing on this one :)
Friday 8 July 2011
Day 23: Share your favourite tune
oooh I have many. I go through phases and I will generally have a couple of songs at one time that I will just play on repeat until I hate it. At the moment its 'Guy what takes his time' and 'Something's got a hold on me' from the burlesque soundtrack, but thats mainly because I can dance sexy(ish) to one, and the other has words which are fitting for me at the moment. However I do have some songs that I always love and always go back to.
I love this, I just do,
I also love Fishermans Daughter from the Waifs, I get bored of it from time to time and pick another favourite, but I think its my all time fav of theirs. unfortunately I dont think theres a good copy of it on the net :(
Wow, I could list loads, 'Famine' by Xavier Rudd, 'Good Excuse' and 'Zebra' from John Butler Trio.
I also love this, this version only, I find it very touching. (only need to listen till about 2mins 15secs)
Im sure theres many others, but this is the list for now
I love this, I just do,
I also love Fishermans Daughter from the Waifs, I get bored of it from time to time and pick another favourite, but I think its my all time fav of theirs. unfortunately I dont think theres a good copy of it on the net :(
Wow, I could list loads, 'Famine' by Xavier Rudd, 'Good Excuse' and 'Zebra' from John Butler Trio.
I also love this, this version only, I find it very touching. (only need to listen till about 2mins 15secs)
Im sure theres many others, but this is the list for now
Wednesday 6 July 2011
hello again world
teehee, not been on here for a while, iv not kept up with the 50day challenge, i do fully intend to get back on that.
I am pleased to say that I am well and truly over the looser that obv thought I wasnt worth fighting for, its funny, he always used to tell me he loved me, but words mean nothing unless backed up by actions, so thats all they were, empty words. I just need to get my stuff back, I want my cane, i love it, and he has it, bah humbug.
I am also very pleased to report some big achievements of the last seven days. I graduated today, passed my degree, with honours with a 2:2, couldve done way better had I applied myself and not had a massive fight on my hands trying to prove that I was brilliant, and not just mental, it went unnoticed needless to say. (actually, maybe i am more mental than brilliant, but hey dont piss on my bonfire)
I also ran race for life last thursday, well i jogged it, but ran the whole 5k (a little over 3 miles) without stopping, even drank some water while jogging, and didnt chuck it all down my front, so thats a bonus. I hope my nana is proud
I also weighed myself this morning, dads scales say I weigh abou 9st9lbs so im going down, woop woop.im on my way.
Generally, life is looking up at the moment, i have a date on friday (I know, whitwoo) and feel it deserves a mention as the victim reads my blog, or has read it at least (dear lordy). To be very fair, im suprised hes read this and still likes me, but hey, stranger things have happened at sea. He did say he cant cook....maybe he just wants me for my cookery skills...hmm :)
oh, and i drew a logo for a friend and he likes it, he didnt ask for it, i just saw the mostrosity that one of his friends had done for him and thought, damn i could do better than that, so i did...go me
right i best be off, iv left myself hardly any time to make myself look pretty for tonights celebratory events.
Over and out, love and hugs xxx
ps, spelling, punctuation and grammer has taken the day off today :)
I am pleased to say that I am well and truly over the looser that obv thought I wasnt worth fighting for, its funny, he always used to tell me he loved me, but words mean nothing unless backed up by actions, so thats all they were, empty words. I just need to get my stuff back, I want my cane, i love it, and he has it, bah humbug.
I am also very pleased to report some big achievements of the last seven days. I graduated today, passed my degree, with honours with a 2:2, couldve done way better had I applied myself and not had a massive fight on my hands trying to prove that I was brilliant, and not just mental, it went unnoticed needless to say. (actually, maybe i am more mental than brilliant, but hey dont piss on my bonfire)
I also ran race for life last thursday, well i jogged it, but ran the whole 5k (a little over 3 miles) without stopping, even drank some water while jogging, and didnt chuck it all down my front, so thats a bonus. I hope my nana is proud
I also weighed myself this morning, dads scales say I weigh abou 9st9lbs so im going down, woop woop.im on my way.
Generally, life is looking up at the moment, i have a date on friday (I know, whitwoo) and feel it deserves a mention as the victim reads my blog, or has read it at least (dear lordy). To be very fair, im suprised hes read this and still likes me, but hey, stranger things have happened at sea. He did say he cant cook....maybe he just wants me for my cookery skills...hmm :)
oh, and i drew a logo for a friend and he likes it, he didnt ask for it, i just saw the mostrosity that one of his friends had done for him and thought, damn i could do better than that, so i did...go me
right i best be off, iv left myself hardly any time to make myself look pretty for tonights celebratory events.
Over and out, love and hugs xxx
ps, spelling, punctuation and grammer has taken the day off today :)
Tuesday 17 May 2011
Day 22-A photo that makes you happy
Looking through my photos on facebook theres a few that make me smile. However the one below shows the happiest I have been in ages, was such a great nite, and I really felt accepted. Made many new friends that nite aswel, and I was quite happy to act the baffoon, as you can tell.
Monday 16 May 2011
Day 21-My favourite tv program
Well I have many.....
My favourite trashy programmes are Gok's fashion fix.....I LOVE Gok!!! and Supersize v Superskinny.
In terms of in depth programmes there are loads I just devote lots of my time to....
Supernatural
Vampire Diaries
Sanctuary
Fringe
Eureka
Warehouse 13
Merlin
Primevil
and they are just the ones that are still running, I am constantly on the lookout for a new supernaturally type programme to watch, and have finished many series that have been canned, or just run its course (such as LOST and The 4400)
My favourite trashy programmes are Gok's fashion fix.....I LOVE Gok!!! and Supersize v Superskinny.
In terms of in depth programmes there are loads I just devote lots of my time to....
Supernatural
Vampire Diaries
Sanctuary
Fringe
Eureka
Warehouse 13
Merlin
Primevil
and they are just the ones that are still running, I am constantly on the lookout for a new supernaturally type programme to watch, and have finished many series that have been canned, or just run its course (such as LOST and The 4400)
Day 20-A letter to someone that changed your life
Dear Andrew
Well, what do I say, you totally wasted a massive chunk of my life, and I can't say I remember any part of it fondly. You treated me terribly, hit me, spat at me, stole from me....but I lived through it, and will never make the mistake of trusting someone like you again. I lost all the confidence I ever had because of you, no-one ever ran me down like you did, and it has only been in the last couple of years that I have gained some of that confidence back.
However I now think I am a much stronger person now than I was before, but I shan't thank you for that, it was a lesson no-one should have to learn in that manner.
The only grace I have from you is my dog, u took me to pick her up, granted you threatened to take her when we finally split, but she was my dog, and I wasn't about to let anyone take her away from me.
I really seriously hope that someone hurts you the way that you hurt me, what goes around has to come around, and if it hasn't yet, it most surely will, and I never wish badly upon anybody.
I wish I could erase that time from my mind, I really do, I always try and live by the idea of no regrets, but I truly honestly regret pretty much every moment wasted on you
Emer
Well, what do I say, you totally wasted a massive chunk of my life, and I can't say I remember any part of it fondly. You treated me terribly, hit me, spat at me, stole from me....but I lived through it, and will never make the mistake of trusting someone like you again. I lost all the confidence I ever had because of you, no-one ever ran me down like you did, and it has only been in the last couple of years that I have gained some of that confidence back.
However I now think I am a much stronger person now than I was before, but I shan't thank you for that, it was a lesson no-one should have to learn in that manner.
The only grace I have from you is my dog, u took me to pick her up, granted you threatened to take her when we finally split, but she was my dog, and I wasn't about to let anyone take her away from me.
I really seriously hope that someone hurts you the way that you hurt me, what goes around has to come around, and if it hasn't yet, it most surely will, and I never wish badly upon anybody.
I wish I could erase that time from my mind, I really do, I always try and live by the idea of no regrets, but I truly honestly regret pretty much every moment wasted on you
Emer
Saturday 14 May 2011
Day 19- Whatever takes your fancy
I have a major thing for vintage dresses, I bought one about an hour ago off ebay, I cannot wait for it to arrive....
unfortunately though I cannot post a pic on here as ebay doesnt let u copy pictures :(
I have alot of them now, I havent worn any yet!
unfortunately though I cannot post a pic on here as ebay doesnt let u copy pictures :(
I have alot of them now, I havent worn any yet!
Friday 13 May 2011
Day 18-Share or set a goal
Well considering the crappy time I am having this week, I think I need to set a whole bunch. And loosing that someone special is always, to me anyway, a time to change so lets start a list.
1. Loose some more weight, I still weigh over 10 stone! Not happy about that, so lets say get down to 9 stone 5 by my birthday, thats the 26th Nov, so about 12lbs to lose in 6 months, thats achievable.
2. Learn to walk in heels, silly one I know but I hate having lots of lovely high heels and never being able to walk in them.
3. Sort out all my crap and sell it off, I have so much stuff, I do not need it all, lets try and get this done by September.
4. Get fit, I'm so pathetic, I can barely run a few metre before becomming a wheezy mess.
That'll do for now, I know they arent all goals as such, but they are prompts for me to try and sort my life out somewhat.
1. Loose some more weight, I still weigh over 10 stone! Not happy about that, so lets say get down to 9 stone 5 by my birthday, thats the 26th Nov, so about 12lbs to lose in 6 months, thats achievable.
2. Learn to walk in heels, silly one I know but I hate having lots of lovely high heels and never being able to walk in them.
3. Sort out all my crap and sell it off, I have so much stuff, I do not need it all, lets try and get this done by September.
4. Get fit, I'm so pathetic, I can barely run a few metre before becomming a wheezy mess.
That'll do for now, I know they arent all goals as such, but they are prompts for me to try and sort my life out somewhat.
Thursday 12 May 2011
Day 17-A photo that makes you sad
Wednesday 11 May 2011
I hate me right now
I know your never going to read this, but I just want to say I am so sorry and I wish you were here, genuinely. I needed to write it somewhere
Tuesday 10 May 2011
Day 15- A letter to someone you wish you could meet.
Really not feeling upto this today, but I've missed quite a few days now and I really want to get into the habit of blogging.
To my soulmate.
I really hope that one day I will meet you, I often wonder if I already have and just havent realised it. Maybe I've already had you and lost you, or maybe I just don't know you well enough yet. I hope that you see something as special in me as what I hope I find in you.
I wish you were here already, I really hurt right now, and I wish I had someone special to hug me and tell me that everything is going to be ok, even if it isn't. I feel like I'm crumbling away and I need someone to gather me back up and keep me strong.
I know they say that there is someone out there for all of us, they never say whether we will actually ever meet this person, only that they exist, so I know you are out there.
Please come find me, I need you.
Emer
To my soulmate.
I really hope that one day I will meet you, I often wonder if I already have and just havent realised it. Maybe I've already had you and lost you, or maybe I just don't know you well enough yet. I hope that you see something as special in me as what I hope I find in you.
I wish you were here already, I really hurt right now, and I wish I had someone special to hug me and tell me that everything is going to be ok, even if it isn't. I feel like I'm crumbling away and I need someone to gather me back up and keep me strong.
I know they say that there is someone out there for all of us, they never say whether we will actually ever meet this person, only that they exist, so I know you are out there.
Please come find me, I need you.
Emer
I feel really down today
Things went from bad to worse for me today. Most stuff is on the whole unimportant, but my relationship status all went bad. I have been seeing a guy for two years now, and for the last, probably 8 months, things have been pretty bad and not what they should be. we have barely spoke to, or seen each other in the last month, and today it all came to head. He rang me while I was helping a friend, and despite me saying it wasnt a good time, he carried on and I had to put the phone down. I rang him as soon as I could and as usual we ended up arguing, but decided to meet up and talk things over on wednesday. However I got home to find out that the hour previous he had posted things up on stupid facebook about me, not naming me, but it was soo obvious that it was about me, and changed his status to single. Not only that but his mother decided to write a nasty comment on my wall. I feel really upset about it all, I do not for a minute want people to think its just him thats horrible, we are both to blame, but I kept it largely to myself, and I really didnt want to lose him completely, and he has made it so. The thing that seems to really hurt me the most is, I poured my heart and every feeling and thing I wanted him to know in a long email. I got a four short line email back, I didnt expect that. I feel so sad, and despite everything, I do really miss him....
Sunday 8 May 2011
Saturday 7 May 2011
Just a silly tea illustration.....
Well I guess aside from doing the 50 day challenge I should start posting some more art. This is something I did just to fill out my portfolio a little, I haven't done much in the way of illustration in the past few years, I have just been trying to get through my Graphic Design degree, during which I decided I really don't want2 be a graphic designer but do want to be an illustrator, but must struggle on to the end of my degree. I hate thinking that I made a wrong decision that I can never really rectify. Oh well, life goes on and I'm gonna do my best to get out of it what I want to, and this is my start. Oh and by the way, I do love a cuppa tea.
Day 13- Whatever tickles your fancy
Well I think I will share my teacup collection with you today, I have only just started collecting, I was inspired by a deviantartist link to start collecting and I have bought a couple off carboots in the last few weeks. And here they are......
My very first cup was the middle one, both the cup and saucer are handpainted with dragons, I love dragons so it caught my eye, and it was only £1. The one to the right was my second cup, its slightly smaller, had a blackbird on the cup and a nest with eggs on the saucer, it's norwegian, and was only 50p! And my latest is the twee white and gold one on the left, which is japanese porcelain and cost me the grand total of £1.35 and u can see the design through it if u hold it up to the light. I hope u like them :)
Day 12: We want to see your teeth today... post a self portrait
I hate my teeth, given the chance (and money) I would have my front two sorted they are far to big! Plus they have a stupid white mark which I am sick to death of being asked 'whats that on your teeth'. Anyway, lovely pic below that I took literally minutes ago just for this, so not exactly looking my best, but not my worst... so what the hey :)
Day 11-Share your favourite recipe
I love to cook, I used to hate it, I do panic when cooking for many, I can manage about six, however I doubt I will ever cook a good roast, I'm best at a good curry...
However, my favourite recipe is banana bread, its absolutely gorgeous and I haven't made it for ages! I found it on the lurpack facebook page...
Ingredients
125g of lurpack (I use any butter, marge if I have to)
150g of caster sugar (I use just ordinary granulated)
1tsp vanilla extract
1 egg beaten
2 very ripe bananas mashed
190g self raising flour
60ml of milk
1. Grease and line a 2lb loaf tin. Melt the Lurpak, sugar and vanilla in a saucepan over a medium heat.
2. Remove from heat and add the mashed bananas, mix well.
3. Add the beaten egg then stir in the flour and milk.
4. Pour the mixture into the prepared tin, sprinkle with a tablespoon of demerara sugar for a crunchy topping. You can also add a few slices of banana to bake into the crust.
5. Bake at 170°C/340°F/Gas Mark 3 for 35 minutes, until a skewer comes out clean. Leave to cool and enjoy!
It is soo yummy, I double the ingredients (plus an extra banana) to make a nice big one, and I do bake slices of banana into the crust and just sprinkle with whatever sugar I have. It is lovely on it's own, or extra indulgent with butter on a slice, and after a few days when it isn't as fresh, it is amazing toasted with butter on. ooo im gonna have to make some now...
However, my favourite recipe is banana bread, its absolutely gorgeous and I haven't made it for ages! I found it on the lurpack facebook page...
Ingredients
125g of lurpack (I use any butter, marge if I have to)
150g of caster sugar (I use just ordinary granulated)
1tsp vanilla extract
1 egg beaten
2 very ripe bananas mashed
190g self raising flour
60ml of milk
1. Grease and line a 2lb loaf tin. Melt the Lurpak, sugar and vanilla in a saucepan over a medium heat.
2. Remove from heat and add the mashed bananas, mix well.
3. Add the beaten egg then stir in the flour and milk.
4. Pour the mixture into the prepared tin, sprinkle with a tablespoon of demerara sugar for a crunchy topping. You can also add a few slices of banana to bake into the crust.
5. Bake at 170°C/340°F/Gas Mark 3 for 35 minutes, until a skewer comes out clean. Leave to cool and enjoy!
It is soo yummy, I double the ingredients (plus an extra banana) to make a nice big one, and I do bake slices of banana into the crust and just sprinkle with whatever sugar I have. It is lovely on it's own, or extra indulgent with butter on a slice, and after a few days when it isn't as fresh, it is amazing toasted with butter on. ooo im gonna have to make some now...
Friday 6 May 2011
Day 10- A letter to someone you hate or caused you alot of pain
Well I'm like a week behind, so for the next few days I will do two a day to get back on track. Had a super busy and slight;y depressing week. Was hoping my degree was pretty much done now, however, the deadline has been moved so got a few more weeks yet, oh well.
Now in terms of someone I hate or has hurt me, I can think of a few.......who to write to.
Well lets begin....
Dear 'someone'
You will never know how much you hurt me, I will never let you see. I did everything you ever wanted me to, even when I felt you longer wanted me around.
You say that I betrayed you, in fact you accused another of betraying you also, yet you seem to have accepted her back into your life as if it was nothing, but I am still here, never given the chance to defend myself, never given the chance to explain myself, never given the chance to make peace.
I feel like I want to confront you, ask you why you feel so strongly against me, but you frighten me immensely, and the thought of you glowering over me while I stutter over my words meekly and try and justify interrupting your day to settle this blows all the courage out of me. I am a strong person now, yet around you I would feel so small.
One day I will pluck up all my reserve and come and speak to you in person, and I hope that we can resolve our issues once and for all, and then I can be at peace.
Regards
Now in terms of someone I hate or has hurt me, I can think of a few.......who to write to.
Well lets begin....
Dear 'someone'
You will never know how much you hurt me, I will never let you see. I did everything you ever wanted me to, even when I felt you longer wanted me around.
You say that I betrayed you, in fact you accused another of betraying you also, yet you seem to have accepted her back into your life as if it was nothing, but I am still here, never given the chance to defend myself, never given the chance to explain myself, never given the chance to make peace.
I feel like I want to confront you, ask you why you feel so strongly against me, but you frighten me immensely, and the thought of you glowering over me while I stutter over my words meekly and try and justify interrupting your day to settle this blows all the courage out of me. I am a strong person now, yet around you I would feel so small.
One day I will pluck up all my reserve and come and speak to you in person, and I hope that we can resolve our issues once and for all, and then I can be at peace.
Regards
Saturday 30 April 2011
Day 9- A list of my favourite.....
Well, the two pages I have bookmarked with the list for the 50 day challenge says two different things, either
1, a list of your favourite facebook fan pages, or 2, a list of your favourite tumblrs.
I don't use tumblr and I don't use fan pages soo.... a list of what today??
My favourite books? Movies? Artists? hmm.....how about just a list of my favourite websites
Well theres the obvious thats always open, facebook and hotmail, I like to know what my friends are doing, and I like to see if anyones has emailed me.
I always have ebay open to, I often have something up for sale and it's exciting to check how many watchers, viewers and bids there are, I love making money, and most things I sell have been bought off a carboot for next to nothing and sold on for a profit. I am also a massive shopoholic so I pretty much always have something I am watching which I may like to purchase.
Another little gem of a webiste is hotukdeals.com I go through phases of what part interests me the most, at the moment it's the misc section, just like a general forum, where people ask random questions, post silly jokes or videos etc. It also has a for sale/trade section, but it is there mostly for the deals section. If you want to find something for a good price, you'll find it on there, from tea n coffee, to tvs, cars, mortgages and phone contracts, when people see something for a good price, they'll let you know on the deals, no need to shop around as everyone else has done it for you. I always check there before buying anything costly as it can save me a packet!
And finally my recent always open website is deviantart. I am a deviant myself, it's a great place for posting bits of drawings, and looking at others for ideas, there groups you can join to keep you motivated and it can be great for networking. You can find me here and here. The second page has nothing on it as yet as I have only just opened it. When my degree is finally over I will be putting all my best work on there.
Anyway, theres my most heavily used pages, not a thrilling post for today, but a post all the same.
1, a list of your favourite facebook fan pages, or 2, a list of your favourite tumblrs.
I don't use tumblr and I don't use fan pages soo.... a list of what today??
My favourite books? Movies? Artists? hmm.....how about just a list of my favourite websites
Well theres the obvious thats always open, facebook and hotmail, I like to know what my friends are doing, and I like to see if anyones has emailed me.
I always have ebay open to, I often have something up for sale and it's exciting to check how many watchers, viewers and bids there are, I love making money, and most things I sell have been bought off a carboot for next to nothing and sold on for a profit. I am also a massive shopoholic so I pretty much always have something I am watching which I may like to purchase.
Another little gem of a webiste is hotukdeals.com I go through phases of what part interests me the most, at the moment it's the misc section, just like a general forum, where people ask random questions, post silly jokes or videos etc. It also has a for sale/trade section, but it is there mostly for the deals section. If you want to find something for a good price, you'll find it on there, from tea n coffee, to tvs, cars, mortgages and phone contracts, when people see something for a good price, they'll let you know on the deals, no need to shop around as everyone else has done it for you. I always check there before buying anything costly as it can save me a packet!
And finally my recent always open website is deviantart. I am a deviant myself, it's a great place for posting bits of drawings, and looking at others for ideas, there groups you can join to keep you motivated and it can be great for networking. You can find me here and here. The second page has nothing on it as yet as I have only just opened it. When my degree is finally over I will be putting all my best work on there.
Anyway, theres my most heavily used pages, not a thrilling post for today, but a post all the same.
Friday 29 April 2011
Day 8-A recent photo of myself
Well I think this is one of my fave pictures of me thats has been taken recently. This was taken at my friends birthday party, which had a burlesque theme. I had on a black corset, a frilly skirt, fishnets and a purply-red tailcoat. I love tailcoats, I have 3! There was a big buildup to this party, I love to dress up, and I always put in loads of effort. I enjoyed myself here, it was a good night.
Thursday 28 April 2011
Day 7-My favourite youtube vid
I have a couple of these. One in particular makes me laugh out loud everytime I see it, the first time I saw it I nearly fell off the table. I think the only person who hasn't found funny is my dad, which is surprising.
The second one is just the cutest video ever, I have to have a cat like this, but ginger, a big fat, stocky ginger cat called garfield who does silly things just like this one :) check out his other vids, Maru is pretty famous u know.
I hope you appreciate them as much as me
The second one is just the cutest video ever, I have to have a cat like this, but ginger, a big fat, stocky ginger cat called garfield who does silly things just like this one :) check out his other vids, Maru is pretty famous u know.
I hope you appreciate them as much as me
Wednesday 27 April 2011
Day 6-A list of what you ate today
Well today isn't quite over, but with it being about quarter past 11, i'm hoping I won't feel the urge to eat much more
My day began (at about 11:30) with a fried egg on a toasted bun(one half, so its open, not a sandwich). Got to have a soft yolk, which is broken with a knife and mixed with a good squirt of red sauce. I always cut off about a third of my bread, cut round the yolk and make a yolk sandwich to finish the meal with as it's the best part.
I did munch on sum hot paprika and smokey bacon pringles not long after with a nice cup of coffee, not a great idea, felt very ill after that.
After recovering I had a mint ice-cream, it is a nice sunny day after all.
Late lunch was the other half of my bun, toasted with butter and cathedral city smokey cheese spread.
One or two cups of tea
Tea was an odd one, I'd taken some chicken out the freezer, so I cut it into chunks and fried it off, with pittas and salad needing to be used I figured we would have a chicken pitta with salad, but the sauce I made was too much, so it was all abit wet. Tasty though, tinned tomms, garlic, cream cheese, lea&perrins, salt and pepper and a dallop of bbq sauce. I served it with a pitta each, lettuce, pickled onions, beetroot and potato salad. was actually all really yummy.
I may have had some more pringles after tea
Thats everything I've eaten so far, I know I'm going to go bed shortly and have somesort of chocolate with a brew while I watch something. I can't help it. But after friday I'm giving up chocolate and crisps, I did it for lent, I'll do it again. Oh and I gave up biscuits since monday, sweets will be next. This week I am eating whatever the hell I want, as of saturday, it'll all be gone.
My day began (at about 11:30) with a fried egg on a toasted bun(one half, so its open, not a sandwich). Got to have a soft yolk, which is broken with a knife and mixed with a good squirt of red sauce. I always cut off about a third of my bread, cut round the yolk and make a yolk sandwich to finish the meal with as it's the best part.
I did munch on sum hot paprika and smokey bacon pringles not long after with a nice cup of coffee, not a great idea, felt very ill after that.
After recovering I had a mint ice-cream, it is a nice sunny day after all.
Late lunch was the other half of my bun, toasted with butter and cathedral city smokey cheese spread.
One or two cups of tea
Tea was an odd one, I'd taken some chicken out the freezer, so I cut it into chunks and fried it off, with pittas and salad needing to be used I figured we would have a chicken pitta with salad, but the sauce I made was too much, so it was all abit wet. Tasty though, tinned tomms, garlic, cream cheese, lea&perrins, salt and pepper and a dallop of bbq sauce. I served it with a pitta each, lettuce, pickled onions, beetroot and potato salad. was actually all really yummy.
I may have had some more pringles after tea
Thats everything I've eaten so far, I know I'm going to go bed shortly and have somesort of chocolate with a brew while I watch something. I can't help it. But after friday I'm giving up chocolate and crisps, I did it for lent, I'll do it again. Oh and I gave up biscuits since monday, sweets will be next. This week I am eating whatever the hell I want, as of saturday, it'll all be gone.
Tuesday 26 April 2011
Day 5-A picture/letter to your crush??
I have the '50 day challenge list' bookmarked from a few different places, and some of the questions vary slightly depending on which website they are hosted on. This is one of them, some say letter, some say photo. I think I'll start with a letter and see how I get on.
Dear Secret Crush
I am a simple being who is swept away by the simple things in life. An innocent compliment, question or smile is all it takes to stir the butterflies in my stomach. I am amazed how oblivious you are to my obvious reactions, my heart races so fast the whole world should be able to hear it, and yet you stand next to me, in that friendly kind of way, and kindly do nothing, just smile...
I shouldn't be attracted to you, you aren't my type, but theres something exciting and wrong about you that makes me think you would be good for me. I do not know you well, I've seen you maybe...a handful of times, but I feel like I know exactly how being with you would be like. I imagine everything would be turned upside-down with spontinaety, mischief and fun, but I would feel like I was really starting to live, like I had finally been set free from all my current confinements and I can really feel again.
I know that if you read this, and it wasn't handed to you by me, that you would have no idea who I am, I have never made myself known to you, we don't share anything apart from precious moments, and because of this I shall carry on only drifting around wishing I had some sort of courage to let you know how I feel. I am just a ghost that wonders through the halls of one miniscule part of your life and I just hope that I have left somesort of imprint to show that I was there, and existed, for a short time.
I would hope that if you did read this it would inspire you to smile often, and smile well, with your whole being. You have an amazing smile, it's what attracted me to you in the first place, and it may just be the thing that gives me the confidence to share my thoughts with you, and if nothing else, feel satisfied that I didn't play out the rest of my life never knowing if you maybe, just possibly, felt the same.
I don't think I want to include a photo, I never know what would be appropriate. If you were trying for the advances of somebody, you would hope that they will love you exactly how you are, not how well you can edit yourself. I feel like I would want to spend ages making sure my hair and complexion were perfect, that I was wearing something flattering and that the lighting was perfect to enhance all my features, yet that isn't who I really am, so I would be sending a farse, and who wants to start a relationship on fallacy? Something so important should be easy, true, happy and natural, not contrived, hard work and designed.
Dear Secret Crush
I am a simple being who is swept away by the simple things in life. An innocent compliment, question or smile is all it takes to stir the butterflies in my stomach. I am amazed how oblivious you are to my obvious reactions, my heart races so fast the whole world should be able to hear it, and yet you stand next to me, in that friendly kind of way, and kindly do nothing, just smile...
I shouldn't be attracted to you, you aren't my type, but theres something exciting and wrong about you that makes me think you would be good for me. I do not know you well, I've seen you maybe...a handful of times, but I feel like I know exactly how being with you would be like. I imagine everything would be turned upside-down with spontinaety, mischief and fun, but I would feel like I was really starting to live, like I had finally been set free from all my current confinements and I can really feel again.
I know that if you read this, and it wasn't handed to you by me, that you would have no idea who I am, I have never made myself known to you, we don't share anything apart from precious moments, and because of this I shall carry on only drifting around wishing I had some sort of courage to let you know how I feel. I am just a ghost that wonders through the halls of one miniscule part of your life and I just hope that I have left somesort of imprint to show that I was there, and existed, for a short time.
I would hope that if you did read this it would inspire you to smile often, and smile well, with your whole being. You have an amazing smile, it's what attracted me to you in the first place, and it may just be the thing that gives me the confidence to share my thoughts with you, and if nothing else, feel satisfied that I didn't play out the rest of my life never knowing if you maybe, just possibly, felt the same.
I don't think I want to include a photo, I never know what would be appropriate. If you were trying for the advances of somebody, you would hope that they will love you exactly how you are, not how well you can edit yourself. I feel like I would want to spend ages making sure my hair and complexion were perfect, that I was wearing something flattering and that the lighting was perfect to enhance all my features, yet that isn't who I really am, so I would be sending a farse, and who wants to start a relationship on fallacy? Something so important should be easy, true, happy and natural, not contrived, hard work and designed.
Monday 25 April 2011
Day 4-A photo of me taken over 10 years ago
Well I'm not really sure how old I was in this photo, about 4, maybe 3? So that would make it over 20 years ago! I'm the one one the right, with my mums friends daughter. Obviously around this time it was fashionable to have the most horrible looking couches. Aww I look so innocent.
Its funny, I always thought I looked alot different now than I did as a kid, looking at photos of me now, I look exactly the same, just older(and paler I think), I'm even back to being blonde at present, although I prefer ashy tones to the nice golden locks I had in the picture above.
Sunday 24 April 2011
Day 3-What is your favourite movie?
Hmm, this is a difficult question, I have many, not sure I could pin one down.
Firstly I am obsessed with Harry Potter, so much so I have a death-eater tattoo on my left forearm, designed it myself so it isn't the official dark mark, I didn't personally like the one they used in the films. Anyway, I love all the films, but the books are better....
I also love the Pirates of the Carribean movies,I am very excited that theres a new one coming out soon, and there is plans for a 5th.
And I do have quite a thing for Wall-e, the cutest robot ever!!
Firstly I am obsessed with Harry Potter, so much so I have a death-eater tattoo on my left forearm, designed it myself so it isn't the official dark mark, I didn't personally like the one they used in the films. Anyway, I love all the films, but the books are better....
And I do have quite a thing for Wall-e, the cutest robot ever!!
Day 2- Make a bulleted list of everything that happened in your day
Day 2 was yesterday, however, I couldn't make a bulleted list of everything that happened in my day before it had ended, I just hope I remember everything.
- woken early by mum, bowt 7:45 to go to the carboots, she very nicely made me a cup of tea, she mustav forget me saying I like to have coffee first thing now.
- got to the carboot in kirkham by around 8:30
- bought 2 vintage dresses, yummy. £1.50 each, I'll have some of that.
- went to a closer carboot on the way home (carboot obsessed). bought nothing at all
- nipped to the posh shop in poulton, spent £70 on an amazing jacket and unusual top
- visited my sister to drop off some things we bought for my niece
- swung by the 3rd best chippy in Britain, seniors for haddock, chips and mushy peas for lunch, just after midday
- went home to eat it with red sauce, yum yum
- curled up on the chair at home, full to the brim, to watch supersize v superskinny
- nipped out to put nanas lottery on, she died a month ago, but want to keep doing them for her, maybe she'll smile down on us and make her numbers lucky. Bless you nana, love you
- came home to stuff myself full of chocky biccies and roses, gave up chocolate for lent, need to catch up.
- Britains got talent started at 8 so had to watch that, not so many numpties as usual, which is dissappointing.
- 10:00 tea, not healthy, but wasn't up for it earlier, dug a flat garlic bread out the freezer, loaded it with sweetcorn, leftover pepperoni, and lots of cheese, was really yummy.
- Michale mcintyre on the comedy roadshow at 11ish, love him!
- Time for beds around midnight, got to have a hot chocolate, and take my laptop so I can watch something, last night it was some Jericho, mustn't stay up late as gonna be up at 7 in the morn.
Friday 22 April 2011
50 day challenge : Day 1-Introduce yourself
Hi, my name is Emer and welcome to my blog. I set this up initially to sit along side my FMP for my graphic design degree, however I have only 10 days left to go until deadline and just remembered to come back to here, so too little to late really, but will have a go regardless. I am also going to combine this with the 50 day challenge I stumbled across on facebook, this will sit nicely with my project as it is about showing how people are more than they seem, or more than you know. Day one of the 50 day challenge is to introduce yourself; my name is Emer, I am 25, I have no kids and no intentions to. I live with my dad and two Lhaso Apso dogs.
My first piece for FMP is to introduce myself as a graphic designer, the initial thing we are judged upon in college. The aim here is to show that I am more than I am initially judged to be.........don't judge a book by its cover. The poster above is unfinished, I'm not sure what to do with it yet. Will repost again when it's done.
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